So, your child is going to rehab. Like most parents in this situation you’re probably a little relieved and a little nervous. Maybe it’s been a long time coming. Maybe it’s entirely out of left field. Either way, no one prepares you for this moment as a parent. So what can you expect?
Just know that the first are going to be a whirlwind; that’s totally normal. When you first arrive at the addiction treatment center there’s going to be a lot of paperwork (so much paperwork). Your loved one will meet with the admissions staff, the medical staff, and the clinical staff for assessments and evaluations. Once they’re all checked in you’ll get a chance to say your goodbyes.
It’s not unusual for your son or daughter to experience a range of emotions from hesitancy to relief. If they need to detox, then their first week in treatment will be spent under 24/7 medical supervision to ensure a safe transition out of physical dependence. While this experience may be uncomfortable for them, it’s your job as a parent to support them from afar while letting the treatment team do their job.
One of the hardest shifts for most parents is moving from being the person who knows everything to…not. It’s super common for treatment programs to have a communication blackout period during the first week or two. You’ll still get updates from staff and be able to reach them if you need anything, but this time allows your child to disconnect and focus on their recovery.
After the blackout period ends, you might get letters, calls or even have scheduled visits on certain days of the week. You also might not hear from your child at all. Everyone’s communication preferences in treatment are different and it’s important that you respect that boundary - whatever it looks like.
Sometimes your loved one may try to manipulate their way out of treatment by tugging at your heart strings. They may blame you. They may say they hate it there. They may beg to come home. During this time, the best thing you can do is offer encouragement without trying to rescue them. Trust the process.
During your treatment you and your child will probably both be dealing with a lot of emotions. Maybe you feel guilty. Maybe angry. Ideally hopeful. Probably all of the above and often in the same day.
Your kid is feeling it too. Their brain, once hijacked by drugs and alcohol, is not recalibrating. That means all those suppressed emotions are coming to the surface. They’re learning how to live life on life’s terms in real time. So are you.
This is when a good support system can make a world of difference. Al-Anon, therapy, or just talking with a trusted friend or another parent can help. You’re not alone. Neither is your child.
If it hasn’t dawned on you yet, addiction treatment isn’t just about your son or daughter. It involves the whole family. Most treatment programs encourage family therapy. If you’ve got a loved one experiencing addiction, then the entire family needs healing and recovery.
During these family sessions, dynamics you weren’t aware of may be revealed. Perhaps you’re an enabler and didn’t even realize it. Is there unresolved family tension or dysfunction that’s contributed to the cycle of addiction? Therapy sessions as a family can be uncomfortable, but that’s usually where the growth happens.
Rehab isn’t a one-and-done deal. When your child completes treatment, there will be a transition period. Some move into sober living homes, some start outpatient treatment, and some come back home. Each path has its own challenges.
If they come home, expect new boundaries. Curfews, drug testing, new routines—it’s all part of reinforcing the work they did in treatment. It’s okay to be firm. It’s okay to have expectations. Just make sure they’re rooted in support, not control.
Relapse is a possibility. It’s not a failure—it’s part of the process for many people. The important thing is how you and your child handle it. A slip-up doesn’t erase progress, and it doesn’t mean all hope is lost. It means adjustments need to be made.
This road isn’t easy, but neither is parenting in general. You’ve made it through scraped knees, teenage rebellion, and late-night “Where are you?” texts. This is another challenge, but it’s one that comes with the possibility of real, lasting healing.
Your child is in treatment—that’s a huge step. Take a deep breath. One day at a time. You’ve got this.